auronlu: (Lulusmile)
auronlu ([personal profile] auronlu) wrote2006-05-09 04:44 pm

Drabble Challenge ~ Shelinda

Hmmm. I'm not quite satisfied with this, and [livejournal.com profile] muggy_mountain did say "Shelinda's perspective on the party".

I'll try again, but here's a wee one.


What does an acolyte know? Crusaders used Machina, and two Maesters gave the orders. I saw, Lady Yuna, how you tended the living and the dead when it was over. Now they call you traitor. Oh, it would have been a fine wedding! And yet... Seymour watched Sin engulf them. Lord Seymour, I mean. Well, I'm sure there's been some mistake. If you're willing to face Sin after that, good luck, Lady Yuna! Good luck to both of us!

[identity profile] mneme-forgets.livejournal.com 2006-05-10 12:17 am (UTC)(link)
I really liked this actually. It somehow seems you have pinned down Shelinda's voice, although I might not be able to articulate how that is. I like the sense to this that it's a sort of desperate address to Yuna. At one point I thought it might be a letter, but I think I like it better as Shelinda's frustrated thoughts in the midst of the chaos of Bevelle.

I love the way she can still be wistful about the wedding even though she has seen Seyour's cruelty firsthand and marvelled at it. I like the way she forgets Seymour's honorific. That would mean a lot to someone like Shelinda and the fact that she has neglected to use it betrays both her ambivalence towards him and her confusion at events.

I love the desperate way she wishes Lady Yuna and herself good luck at the end. It sounds like Shelinda unravelling and I like that thought, given that Yevon is unravelling and it must have her all in a tizzy.

[identity profile] muggy-mountain.livejournal.com 2006-05-10 01:01 am (UTC)(link)
Oh, Shelinda, you lovable timid brown-noser.

I should have not been as broad...one can barely name the entire party in 100 words, let alone portray them from a minor NPC's standpoint.

Still, bravo. I like that she attributes it to a mistake, rather than a fundamental flaw in the system. She clings to that sinking ship like rats in the cargo. Thank you. :)